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The text for the homily this morning is found in Matthew chapter 6.

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Pray then like this,

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Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come,

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your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.

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Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

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And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

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This is the word of the Lord.

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In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.

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It's been nearly 24 years since my wife came to me and let me know that she was pregnant with our first child.

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And as soon as that news started spreading around, that meant that congratulations started spreading around.

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And as I regularly heard, congratulations, I hear you're going to be a father.

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Now, I tried to find a cordial and respectful way to respond to that because I knew that it wasn't exactly accurate.

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They were saying you're going to be a father. I knew I already was a father.

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It was an ontological reality, but it was also an existential reality.

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It was very clear that our daughter was already exerting tremendous influence upon our lives.

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Long before there was a baby bump, long before I learned the joy of playing tag with my daughter while she was still in the womb,

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long before we had the chance to meet her face to face, she was letting us know that she was going to be running the show pretty well.

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And if it was clear to me, it was all the more clear to my wife. Nausea.

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And then there was the fact that I had a lot more time in the evenings free to work on my doctoral studies

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because Joy was going to sleep at about 7 p.m. every night because she was just wiped out.

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And then there was her irrepressible desire to eat eggs.

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We deduced that our daughter just needed some good protein, and she was letting Mom know that rather clearly.

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Now when your daughter is holding such sway over your life, you can't help but act upon her presence.

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The great naming debates began, and we began to strategize how we were going to fit a crib into our one bedroom, 500 square foot apartment.

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And then there were the dreams about just how blessed she would be to look like her mother,

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and how much, well, what were the chances that she would have more hair than her father when she was born.

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Now I cherish those memories looking back on all those things, even now that my daughter is 23 years old and I can watch her living her life as an adult.

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The beauty of those days also means that when a parent's dreams come to a screeching halt,

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when their expectations all of a sudden are gone because the child has perished, you endure an equally deep pain.

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In pastoral care, I have noted that the sorrow of those whose child has died during pregnancy or even later in life is rarely matched,

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except by those couples whose desire for a child has not been answered by the Lord.

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In both scenarios, the depth of the sorrow is driven by the fact that there is unrealized anticipation and expectation of what the future can hold.

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Now such sorrow puts the pastor and the deaconess to the test.

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What do you say to such grieving persons?

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I learned regularly to flee to the words of Jesus.

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Pray like this,

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Our Father.

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There is an unending wealth of goodness in the fatherhood of God.

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Whether you are a father or a mother, whether you mourn for a child or not,

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the fatherhood of God is a blessing for you because each one of you is called to be a child of the Father.

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And while there is unending goodness in the fatherhood of God, let us today rejoice in three specific blessings that come from his fatherhood.

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First, the fatherhood of God delivers freedom.

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Freedom from having to understand everything that has happened.

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Now, I well understand that fallen humans do not readily embrace that kind of freedom.

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I understand it because I myself am a father.

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I have given direction to my children for their benefit and their response is regularly,

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Why?

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They don't want to just take dad at his word.

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They want an explanation as to why dad knows what he's talking about.

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Now at times though, I ask them to simply trust their father's counsel because if I was to reveal to them my rationale,

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it would be counterproductive because I would have to expose them to the very thing from which I'm trying to protect them.

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Dad, why can't I watch that movie?

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I can't tell them what's in that movie that I'm trying to protect them from or they really won't be protected.

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At other times, I ask them, I cannot explain to them my reasons simply because they cannot understand.

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There are things that I know that a 10-year-old just simply cannot grasp.

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Now that's frustrating for the 10-year-old,

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but it is cherished by the 50-year-old who would love to be freed of the responsibility of having to know the harsh reality of what happens in this fallen world.

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Now I understand this because I'm a father.

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And I understand this also because I am a child of the father.

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Too often, it is this child who stands before the father demanding he answer my question of why.

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This child though is called to live in freedom, the glorious and beautiful freedom of being a child of the Father.

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That means that there are things that I cannot understand and there are things from which the father is protecting me

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because he knows that the reality of this fallen world would be far too much for me to bear.

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Rejoice in the fatherhood of God that delivers to you freedom.

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Second, the fatherhood of God delivers confidence.

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Our Father who art in heaven.

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With these words, God tenderly invites us to believe that he is our true father, that we are his true children,

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so that with all boldness and confidence, we may ask him as dear children ask their own dear father.

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From the lament psalms to Habakkuk to the martyrs in the revelation to St. John,

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scripture teaches us that you don't have to be shy when it comes to asking the father.

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Now that is true. That is especially true when it comes to asking him that big question of why.

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Now your confidence is not bound up in the certainty that he's going to tell you why.

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Because again, at times he won't tell you why because you couldn't bear the answer

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and because he wants to protect you from that very reality.

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But your confidence is bound up in this.

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Your Father listens. He listens with a fatherly ear.

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The Father, after all, can handle whatever it is that you ask of him.

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You can be honest when you're angry. You can be honest and not have to hold back when you are broken.

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Confidence is yours because the Father tells you to call upon him in every trouble,

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pray and then even praise and give thanks.

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Third, the fatherhood of God delivers to you peace.

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I have often noticed that the faithful on their deathbed seem to withdraw from their family.

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And that's awfully difficult for the family because what do they want to do in those moments

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but be close to the one that they know from whom they'll soon be parted.

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And it becomes all the more challenging for the family when they notice that their loved one

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is far more receptive to their pastor's presence than to their family's presence.

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But it's really not about the pastor. It's about the one in whose stead the pastor speaks.

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The reality is that that dying person is not withdrawing from the family so much as they are drawing closer to Christ.

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Because it's Christ alone who can understand what they face.

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After all, He has already endured death. And not only endured it, He has conquered death as well.

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Similarly, those who grieve for children are more readily connected with others who also grieve the death of a child.

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They understand what each other is enduring and facing.

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And that is the peace that is delivered by the fatherhood of God.

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He knows what it is to endure the death of his child. His son. His only son whom he loves.

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He knows your grief and he stands with you through it. And he knows even more than that.

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He knows that his Son died and rose again so that you and your child may be a child of the Father.

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A child who lives in freedom, confidence, and peace.

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In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.